Day 1 (or can I even call it that…)

July 23, 2012

How did the first day go of my no Starbucks quest? Well, let’s see, if we’re going to be technical about it, it went great. No Starbucks entered this body today! But, truly? It was a big, old FAIL! Around two o’clock, which is when I normally make the trek to Bucks, that hankering for a sugary, caffeine rush got the best of me and…enter Mr. Burger King Mocha Frappe, stage right.

I really did start out with good intentions. Problem is, and this is where I start to believe it really is an addiction, I went to the mall. Yup. That’s all it took. Because what do I associate with the mall? My coffee. Then I went to Whole Foods. What was right next to Whole Foods? Starbucks. And so, when I arrived home, on my “day off” so to speak (as my mil takes Big Boy on Sundays), all I could think about was that rush. I called my husband and asked him to pick up a Burger King frappe- which I tried once before, as I had a coupon. I will say, I DID look up the ingredients and did not find very detailed information. I feel safe assuming it does not contain carrageenan, but that is only because I know it is not a drink made to be “light”, as the java chip light is. I’m sure it still has caramel color, high fructose corn syrup, and I KNOW the sugar content is just as bad as my java chip light. But here I sit, finishing up the sugary drink that is more or less full of toxins. And even after I called my husband, there was the sense of satisfaction of knowing I would have that rush sooner or later in the day- even if it wasn’t until many hours later. Just the possibility brings a sense of calm. ADDICTION!

I have started thinking about trying to reward myself after a certain amount of time of NOT drinking this stuff, but it seems a bit difficult. For instance, buying a magazine or book- I associate those with relaxing- with my coffee. Watching a movie- same thing. A trip to the mall, shopping- same deal. I’m not a pedicure/spa kind of girl. And, really, shouldn’t not filling my body with toxic substances be reward enough?

What IS it about this sugar/caffeine rush that is so powerful? And it’s not just the sugar- I have cookies, candy and many other sugar sources in the house. It’s not just the caffeine- then I wouldn’t really have this problem, as a cup of coffee a day seems to be considered a relatively not bad thing.

And so, I try again tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day. Another day I can choose not to poison my body. Another day I can make a choice that will benefit myself, and my boys, who I live for!

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One Response to “Day 1 (or can I even call it that…)”

  1. Theresa said

    His mercys are new every morning!! I believe in you!

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